It's a transcript and seems to work well as a video where some details are reiterated for the viewer (you'll see we've done this in other videos as well). You are right, however, as a purely written piece it should be tightened up and all redundancies weeded out.
Thanks for taking the time to write, and for not taking offense!
This article needs some editing. A lot of info is repeated for no apparent reason.
It's a transcript and seems to work well as a video where some details are reiterated for the viewer (you'll see we've done this in other videos as well). You are right, however, as a purely written piece it should be tightened up and all redundancies weeded out.
Thanks for watching anyway Andy.